Last week I was on vacation. Normally, I don't travel anywhere or do day trips to various places. However this year was different. I have been dating Cathy for the nine months. She and I and her daughter Caitlyn, went to Ocean City Maryland. What you need to understand is that Caitlyn is a special needs child. She is 20 yrs old, diagnosed with cerebral palsy, suffers seizures, diabetes, unable to speak and is wheelchair bound. As I have gotten to know Cathy, I have also gotten to know Caitlyn. Some people might think Cait can't experience the world around her. You would be wrong. She loves pudding. She loves to laugh. While she may not be able to see except for shadows, her eyes can tell a story.
Cathy told me that Cait loves to travel in the van. That was pretty clear by her expressions in between naps on the four hour trip. Yet I was to experience so much more from Cait's perspective. While her hearing is oversensitive, and we needed to protect her eyes from the sun with sunglasses, She wanted to spend every minute in her chair on the balcony. We moved her inside the room from the balcony and she had what could be described as a meltdown. Yet we didn't want her to get sunburned. So we put the front wheels of the wheelchair over the threshold of the balcony door with most of her inside. IN a split second she was quiet and relaxed again.
I can sit her at my computer and tell you that she also loved the boardwalk. Cait likes to be in motion. If you stop pushing her in her chair for too long. Well...you will know it. But the additional attraction is not simply the movement for Cait on the boardwalk. It was I believe a multi-sensory experience for a child who, again, many would think wouldn't she could experience anything. Her experience on the boardwalk was, in the hearing of the people, the seagulls, the waves. Her experience on the boardwalk was the motion of her chair as well as the "bumps" of the actual boardwalk as her wheels traveled over each board. And while she may not be able to see as you and I do, the light and dark of the experience, along with all the other senses, brought her to her place of peace.
Too often in our lives we see aside other people's experience in favor of what we know and experience. rather than listening and hearing how something impacts or impacted someone, we assume we know. I have been on mission trips to Russia and heard people ask, "How can people live like that?" The fact is if you lived the way they do, you too would have to adapt as they have. One of my pet peeves is hearing people say, "I know how you feel." Often it is said as something for comfort. But can we truly understand how people feel? How they experience things we have not experienced?
In my short time getting to know Cait, I have seen someone, again who one might think has no concept of the world around, experience the world I experience, in a way that is as real as what I experience or even more so for Cait. Most times, there are few activities for Cait. She has come to enjoy those experiences we often take for granted. The brightness and the warmth of the sun in our face. The sounds of the waves crashing against the shoreline with seagulls crying all around. The feel of the sand, the "bumps" of the boardwalk and so much more.
Take some time to focus. Take a deep breath and listen. Take a deep breath and look around. We all have a different perspective on this world around us. No one is better than another. Yet together, our perspectives can make our world come alive in ways we hadn't ever thought of before. Cathy and I may be able to share our worlds with each other without even thinking. But I have found that I am also enjoying the perspective that God has given Caitlyn to share. Maybe if we took some extra time with people like Ciatlyn, we might be able to understand this world in a whole new way.
Peace